Russell Edward Smith

Dad I was thinking yesturday as Danny was talking bout goin fishing all the times we went down to the river below the house and went fishing.
Remember the time my pole had very short length of line on it so  I just tossed it out as far as It would go about 10 feet into the water and I had that hit on the line and I jerked that pole up hard as I could cause you told me before jerk it up hard to snag the fish. I jerked it up and up flew up over my head and smack on the ground behind me went the line with that fish on it. I remember you laughin so hard you couldnt stop really made me feel good seeing you laugh. I was so happy too I caught a fish. But remembering you smiling seeing your face in my memories brings joy to my heart. I love these memories you keep bringing to me thanks dad it really is good to know your here with me still laughin and making me laugh with ya. Love ya daddy your daughter Melissa

Dad you remember buying me the garden tools when I was little at the hardware store when we had the big garden down by the river. They were just the perfect size for me to help you weed it out when you came home from work and was tired and it was so hot out and no one wanted to go down and help you but I would after you were gone down to the garden I would gather my tools and carry them down over the railroad tracks and down the trail I was so afraid of cause of the snakes and I would find you sweatin like all get out. You would see me and just smile and it made me feel all warm inside in my heart knowing you were happy to see me. We would hoe that garden and take a break under the big shade tree and talk about whatever came to mind then. Together we would walk back and I felt so proud to help you and just spend time with you not wanting you to have to do it all cause you worked so hard in that garment plant I remember watching you work down there and how extremely hard it was to push that cutting knife thru all those layers of cloth. You worked yourself half to death to take care of us all and I dont think I ever thanked you and I want you to know I do so appreciate it and understand why you did what you did and why coming home your were sometimes grouchy I totally understand it. I miss you dad. Love you your daughter Melissa

I remember when you use to let me set in your lap when Dave would come to visit and I was a little girl and  I would give you a kiss on the cheek and Dave would carry on and say I was making him jealous so I would go sit on his lap and kiss him on the cheek and you would carry on and say I was making you jealous. I remember also how I always said when I grow up I was gonna marry you I was a little girl and loved my daddy and back then nobody thought anything sick about it cause it was innocent. How I miss sitting on your lap and smelling your aftershave lotion on. Old Spice I still love that scent it is my reminder of you.
I remember the time I got stung those many times by honey bees running barefoot in the yard and you wouldnt yell at me or anything but help me get the stinger out and take tomato plant leaves and crush them up and put it on the hole where the stinger was to help draw out the poison.
I remember how proud I was when you figured out a way that worked for me teaching me how to tie my shoes. Cause I was left handed I couldnt do it the way other people did and you realized that and I was so happy with myself I felt like I won a million dollars.
I remember you teaching me how to swim down in Shirleys pool when I was 16 yrs old. I was so happy and relieved. I sure do miss those times when you were teaching me things. Like to drive that huge old Ford truck. How to shoot a gun. Ride a bike, tie my shoes. Do my math, spelling learning how to read a watch.
Now that my mind is not so full of grief all the good memories are coming in and it feels my heart with warmth and I know they are from you watching over me. I feel you with me all the time daddy and I love you for not leaving me alone.
I cant wait to see you.  Love you daddy, your daughter Melissa

Dad,
One of my sweetest memories is when Jim Cale broke up with me when I was 16 cause mom thought he was too old for me, and she called his mother and made her make him end it. I remeber you tryin to comfort me for 3 days I cried seemed like non stop and you knew how much I hurt, how much I loved him and I was laying in bed crying and you came in and kissed me ontop of my head and I heard your heart breaking for me in your voice when you told me "I love you babe". I know you felt my pain and you knew what I was going thru. Dad you have always been on my side and have done millions of things for me. Always ALways ALWAYS helping me out every time one way or another. You never let me down and I dont think I ever told you that I realized what you sacraficed for me how you loved me so much. How I wish I could take back some time and tell you everything I didnt and thought I had all the time in the world.
I realize that now I got to live for today. Not save something special back for special occassion because I might not be there for that specail occassion. To tell my family and children the love I feel and to do all I can do and live all I can live to the fullest and not just sit around and mildew as you would say and waste my precious time that I could be spending with family and enjoying life. To never take for granted tomorrow.
Daddy I want you to know I have been talking to God again and he hasnt forgotten me like I worried he would have. I know he loves me and is helping me to get back to you. I miss you dad, I miss the talks, the holding hands, the walks we used to take. The fishing down at the river. There is so much. I want to thank you for being my dad and making me as strong willed as you did. I have so very much of you in me and I am proud. For your strength you have given me and helped me be independant and not to just rely on someone else. I know you gave me that when you passed on cause I became a much stronger person and mother when you left. I know that gift was from you so you wouldnt have to worry bout me any more. Thank you daddy. I am looking forward to seeing you again. Are you spending time with my children that never were able to be born? I believed you when you said they are in heaven waiting on me and now your there I know your with them. I cant wait to be with all 3 of you and Uncle Bob and Uncle Satch. Bet you guys are having the time of your lives. You deserve it too daddy. I miss you and love you for ever and ever, I will see you when its time. Love Melissa

I remember my 13th birthday and I had the flu and I felt just awful and thats when we always celebrated mine and Scotts, birthday together cause we were born same day.
I mustered every ounce of energy I had to get myself up to go to Aunt Helens cause you had a special present for me and I didnt want to disappoint you.
I remember feeling so weak I could barely keep my head up. Every one was handing Scott all those expensive gifts like they did every year and naturally moms dad and mom gave me the usual $1.00 each. You knew how it made me feel and you gave me my present and when I opened it I couldnt believe it you bought me a womans watch and I was so happy I tried my  best to show you as enthusiastically as I could how happy I was. I just was so spent from being sick. But I knew you bought that for me out of all the love you felt and you wanted me to have something specail for my 13th birthday. Oh how I wish I still had that watch.
I miss you dad my heart is still breakin to this day, some days are just horrible. I want to talk to you so bad I feel like I could go crazy. I dont have anyone to talk to about the things we did. Mom is not mom anymore and its not because of you but because of what she has become. You did your best to make up for what ever she felt and thats all you could do and God knows your heart and you had a heart full of love and Im sure you still got it now its 100 times as big as before.

Dad,
I love you very much and will have you in my heart forever. I miss you everyday and wanted to spend my birthday with you. I remember one birthday in particular I had the flu what a day to have the flu and it was a tradition me and cousin Scott always celebrate birthdays together born the same day in all. I felt so bad that day but didnt want to disappoint anyone so I made it thru and presents were being passed out and I opened yours you picked out for me it was my 14th birthday I remember and inside the box was a watch. You got me a grown up wrist watch I had been wanting a watch for so long and there it was a wonderful beautiful watch my dad picked out especially for me. I was so thrilled it took every ounce of my energy to get up and hug you I really wanted to jump up and down and shout out loud but was so weak and I hope you knew how thrilled I was to get a watch of my very own.
It made my day and I will never forget it for as long as I live. I love feeling you walk with me and are around me always you watch over and care for me and it means everything to me daddy. I love you and cant wait to be with you again someday.
Love your daughter Melissa

Hi Dad,It's me Sabrina.
I almost forgot what day it is.Sorry! A person can get caught up in things here.It's not like there in Heaven!
Anyway I miss you pops and wish you were on the other end of the phone when I have a notion to call you.Which is a lot. I got a hold of Karen and Aunt Miahael,it is also Uncle Bobs birthday.I bet you guys are having one heck of a party up there.Wish I was there.But I will be one day.
I love you dad.You have a great Birthday.

Dad,
Im missing you so much and wish things still could be differnt. I wish the most is you could of met Kirsten, She is such a cutie pie. Really filling out and I just love her to pieces.
I know you would love her too. Im sure you can hear her wailing out when she is hungry.
I think about you all the time and cant wait to see you again.
Keep watchin over all of us and be happy you deserve it that the truth.
Will be together soon I hope.
I love you daddy
Love Melissa

Dad I still cry, it hurts so much it isnt ever gonna be better till I hear your voice again. I miss so dearly our talks and your advice and mostly your understanding and love you showed me. You were my best friend, always understood and listened to my complaints and always made me feel better. I wish you wouldnt of went away. I want to hear you say love you honey. I want to see you. I want to feel your brushy beard scraping against my cheek when I give you a kiss on the cheek.
Every time I think of you it still lonely, But I know when I come to heaven to see my unborn children that past away before being born that you are there with them talkin to them telling them all the pain I was growin up but how much you loved me. Letting them know that I love them very much and want to meet them very badly for us all to be together.
I can still hear your voice, You got a great grand daughter about to be born here with in the next week. I am so sad you never got the chance to see them or hold either one of Killians little girls.
They surely would of loved their great grandpa.
I love and miss you dad and cant wait to see you to hear your voice again. Just know that I love you with all of my heart and forever will.
Your daughter Melissa
XOXOXOXO

Daddy,
I am missing you more each day. I think about you all the time. Its that I dont know if your wanting me to know something tryin to tell me something or what. But it is so strong. I think cause I am so stressed at work and I am at work more than I am at home I got so much going on I am not leaving a opening for me to hear what your sayin to me.
Oh daddy Wow ok I know what it is just this instant, you want me to know your with me when I am loosing my mind at work. Thats why your presence is more stronger when I am at work.
I knew I should of just asked you when I was at work what you wanted to tell me.
I wish I could hold your hand hug you tight kiss your bushy brushy bearded cheek again. I miss you so much.
Arent you so proud of Killian he really has turned around. Not the punk kid anymore. Really has grown up. Hes thriving in his new job. Dont miss a day. He has so impressed his boss that his boss works him with him. Told him that he is making him his apprentice, he is training him to work the office, go on job recruits, setting prices, setting up jobs. Teaching him the ends and outs of the whole business. Said in a couple yrs he wants to turn it over to him to be top supervisor to run the shop and all the guys, cause he doesnt want to have to be there all the time, the boss that is. Killian has shown him that he has intergrity and honesty and hard dependable worker. I am so happy for him, so very proud. I am so happy you have been able to turn him around.
Russ, he has really taken after you dad. He has such a loving and generous heart. There isnt anything he wouldnt do for me. He is so loving. Got the biggest heart of anyone I know. Always there to help mom. He is a special gift from God too as is Killian. I know I was meant to have those two boys they have saved my life and made it oh so sweet. I wouldnt change a thing about having them.
I just wanted you to know which you already do that I love you and miss you and cant wait to see you again and watch over the boys and help them the right direction so we all can be in heaven together daddy.
Missing you so much I love you daddy. Melissa